The Miserable Luck of a Fattie

So, I will first say that I know I'm not fat. I feel like I should mention that because otherwise I'm going to get very angry comments. I'm very happy with my body, thanks. When I say "fattie" I do not mean to imply anything about my body shape, but rather the amount of food that I put into my body. Which is a lot. And my overwhelming desire to eat basically all the time has led to, among other things, a credit card bill full of restaurant tabs (along with drinking tabs, gas, and my cell phone bill. Not much else.).

Tonight... well, my overwhelming desire to eat just lost me $5. That's right. First of all, I'm in Pendleton (please see my balloon story if you're confused), and I didn't bring food with me. It's like, a five minute walk back to my room, but if I went back, I would never leave, and therefore never finish this paper. Besides, my room is stocked with the very basics right now-- beer, hommus, carrots, almonds, and pickles-- which I've been sustaining myself on for a week now. So I want something different.

So I need change for the vending machine so that I can buy one of three vegan things in there (none of which are healthy, but that's beside the point). All I have is a five dollar bill. Being the smart person that I am, I know that the copying machine takes five dollar bills. So I insert my five dollars and then hit the change button... and then realize I have to make a copy before I can get change.

Of course I stick my head under the copy machine (and oh yes, someone passed by at this point) and make the silliest face I can think of, and hit the green "copy" button.

Nothing happens.

The machine is broken. Not broken enough not to take my five dollars, NO. Only broken enough to make me self-depricate to no avail.

So I lost five dollars. Sigh. And it all would've been totally worth it if I could've gotten change.